Deodorant is not optional, its extra.

We've all been there haven't we?
Wake up extra early so that we may have a few minutes of guilt free time alone with our cup of coffee; hot and so ready for your lips to wrap ... er, I think I'm mixing up my stories here.
The point is that morning coffee is golden and a moment alone to enjoy it without worrying that you haven't fed the child yet is almost as valuable.
Then it happens, the stirring awake of your beloved, your real raison d'etre. It really is exciting to experience her morning joy, the thrill of the new day of adventures ahead of her; all refreshed and perky.

So you've sacrificed your few minutes of time for a beverage as opposed to perhaps taking a shower all by yourself today. You could have done it! She was asleep, you may have EVEN been able to shave your armpits!
No, no, coffee was the right choice.
Speaking of armpits, how 'bout that deodorant ... in a minute.
So now she's up, full of energy, not hungry but has to eat because we have to be out the door in an hour. An hour. Seems like lots of time right? Well, we'll definitely forgo bathing today to gain a ... well an hour at least!
She is jumping on the couch cushions which are now on the floor and her juice, which was waiting for her when she awoke, is spurting out of the sippy cup all over the rug. Oh yeah and she has no clothes on, which is GREAT because now getting dressed will only be half the battle!
Mop up the juice spots. Spoon feed yogurt into mouth of child who is only in focus because of that cup of coffee you had, for her movements are fast & frenetic.
Yay, one arm is IN the sleeve! Oops, a little yogurt on the cuff. Blends in, its fine. Toaster pops, paint it with peanut butter, cut off crusts, cut into quarters and serve.
She didn't want peanut butter, she wanted honey.
Start all over with the toast, there is now peanut butter in her hair? Nevermind, find the pants.
She doesn't want the pants you picked out ... search entire pants drawer for the ones she had in mind (as if she ever truly had some in mind in the first place).
Pants are on!
Turn on television to occupy her while she grazes on her ... OH! The toast! Remove now cold toast from toaster & goop it up with honey. Serve toast again. Now she wants peanut butter.
Leave room.
Throw some snacks in a bag, special toy, alternate special toy, extra clothes ... okay go get child.
She has removed her outfit, every stitch.
The bus comes in 15 minutes and both of us have yet to get dressed, some of us for the second time.
We spend the next 14 minutes getting dressed, putting on snowsuit, packing up breakfast, taking off snowsuit to pee (had to put that in there), redressing & out the door. Argue a bit over whether or not to take the stroller & who did you pack in my bag today, did you bring so & so...
Eventually we are running down the street waving after the bus, begging to be let on. Out of breath & sweaty, we climb on the bus and of course, I forgot to apply deodorant.

Pause to think how I could have prepared most of this the night before so as to avoid the whole scenario. But no, instead, I blogged. So deodorant was not an option. And having no coffee was not an option. In fact, the coffee is what made the whole thing possible!